The Day You Were Born

Oh Remi Bear, I have so much to tell you.. so let’s start from the beginning!

My contractions started a week before you actually arrived. We had a scheduled c-section for November 14th and I was R E A D Y for you! Daddy was so excited he could hardly wait. He was admittedly a little disappointed that he wasn’t going to get the call at work that I was in labour and he needed to rush home, but as long as you were okay he didn’t mind either way.

Well, in classic us fashion, those contractions that started a week early only got closer and closer together until they were SO painful and only 7 minutes apart. Since we were high risk the doctors wanted us to come in. I gave daddy the call that he wanted so badly and he rushed home.

I on the other hand was not rushing as the panic quickly set in. I needed to read all the baby books and pack a hospital bag and literally anything other than going to the hospital.

Now, I hope things are different by the time you read this. But when you were born the world was a very crazy place. I had to do all of my appointments and procedures alone and I was not ready to be alone waiting until they let daddy in.

But, I was going to be a mommy now and I have to show you how to be brave. So grandma came over and packed us up and off we went to the hospital. (stopping at Inn n Out first of course)

Walking to those hospital doors I was so scared. Grandma hugged me goodbye and I sobbed. This is not how it is supposed to be. I should be walking in here with daddy and grandma by my side and our whole family waiting for us in the other room so daddy could burst in and announce your arrival.

I wiped my tears and went in, alone.

They quickly hooked me up to tons of machines and monitored the both of us.

FOR 7 HOURS

Before finally letting daddy come in.

Don’t you worry though baby girl, daddy and grandma stayed close by at a brewery anxiously waiting and already celebrating you!

As soon as I called daddy he was by my side. We watched movies and laughed the entire night together. Talking about you and what our new little family will be like.

The next morning not much had changed. My contractions were now 2 minutes apart but they wanted to send me home and see if we could wait it out for our scheduled delivery date.

Unreal. I was in so much pain and you were clearly ready.

The fluid you were in inside my belly was low so they decided to deliver. It would be a while so they sent daddy off to go eat breakfast and have some coffee.

As he stepped out.. Whooooosh.. an entire team of people came in. Prepping me, talking to me, asking me questions, it was a whirlwind just like a movie!

In no time at all they were asking me where your dad was?!

Well…. you JUST told him to go eat and relax. Panic set in and they told me to call him or he was going to miss it.

WHAT?!

I call daddy as they walk me to the OR. He’s rushing and meets me just outside the operating room doors. He gives me a kiss and I’m off, alone again, but not for long this time.

In the operating room they give me a spinal shot of some sorts to numb my body for the procedure. I lay down as the curtain goes up blocking my view.

They start.

Very clinical, no one talking to me.

Like I am not even here.

The anesthesiologist was the only one that checked on me. I told him how scared I was but that I needed him to make sure he keeps me awake.

I needed to see you the moment you arrived!

My body kept moving back and forth but I had no clue what was going on. If they started cutting me open? were they just preparing still?

Time stood still.

Soon, daddy walked in and sat by my side. Holding my hand. Talking to me.

I feel peace. Calm, with him by my side.

Our little family was about to be born.

Side Note

**It is VERY freaking being wide awake in the operating room, cant move, knowing they are literally cutting open your stomach to take out your little baby. Seriously, unreal.**

I just remember looking over at daddy, feeling so many things, but the peace and joy as I looked into his eyes holding his hand in the midst of this moment took over everything.

You must have been ready to come as well because you burst your little hand out of mommy’s tummy and the doctors all yelled, “Not yet!!”

A few minutes later, they called it. 9:25 AM.

You were here.

We did it.

Daddy cuts your umbilical cord (blood squirting all over him)

They wrap you up and I see you.

I see you.

Oh baby girl, there you were… so tiny and ours.

I could hardly catch my breath.

No words able to leave my mouth.

I wasn’t ready for you but I had waited my whole life to meet you at the same time.

My missing pieces made sense.

I was made to be your mommy.

The rest of the stay was a whirlwind. So much concern over my healing and my bleeding but we were fine.

God is so good. We were fine.

They let us leave a day early so we could be home and starting our life.

Within 3 days of your arrival, we were home.

Shooter loved you instantly, and wouldn’t leave your side. Checking on your every 20 minutes and panic if he didn’t know what room you were in.

Our little family, all together, in our little home.

In the midst of chaos, my world finally makes sense.

I am yours & you are mine.